One month.

Boy, does time fly by.

Mia is already a month and 3 days. It's crazy. Whoever is still pregnant out there, enjoy it because I miss being pregnant. Not saying that I hate having an outside baby, but I just miss being pregnant in general. If I could be pregnant right now and keep Mia outside of the ute, I would. Yes I'm a little on the crazy side haha.

She is getting so big though. So much has changed since the hospital. More and more she grow into her tiny little features. 

Ahh so darling! She is really such a good baby though. I was truly blessed from God. I seriously thought God was going to punish me with a child that was colic and stayed up all night. Nope total opposite. Although she does get gas sometimes, and has her fussy periods. She sleeps through the night most of the time and if she does wake up, it's only once. She is the perfect baby anybody could ever ask for.

Postpartum is a bitch. That's all I have to say about that, and I hope it doesn't last forever.

Things with Javier turned out to be a complete and total FAIL. He will not change. In his mind, getting a job and going back to school makes him a changed man. No, absolutely not Javier. He may have taken steps to better his life, but he is none yet, the same person.

We are at war with each other now. I deleted him off of myspace and he freaked out. Too bad, you should of answered my messaged when you had the chance. We're not on speaking terms, and that's probably for the best. As much as I miss him and wishes things would work out, I am so over the bullshit he keeps throwing at me. So I showed him the door, and he wasn't too happy.

So this is what I did.

And now this is me.

 

Happy as a pig in shit. Haaaaa. "Guys are like buses, next one comes in 15."

Hopefully I will find somebody who knows how to treat me right. Who will love me for the way I am, and love the shit out of my beautiful daughter. Although I am not anywhere jumping back into the 'dating' scene anytime soon. I do wish God will send me somebody to help me get over dirtbag over there. Cause that's the only way I think I will get over him, is to find somebody else.

I am nervous though to get back into the groove of dating. It feels like it's been forever.At time I feel like I won't find somebody though, just because I'm so young and I already have a daughter. My body is NOT the same it used to be, and God only knows my vagina isn't the same anymore. So I am wicked nervous for the next guy I meet. I don't know what to say to him, or how to begin to even explain my situation. It's a mess.

But, I will survive. (I wanna get that tattooed on the back of my neck, lmao)