Letting myself go ...

So let's talk about this picture ...

So this is my new default picture on facebook and myspace. Honestly, I freaking hate myspace now, the only reason I keep it is because of Javier's family. I could care less if I talk to Javier or not these days, which is a good thing I believe. But anyways, I love his family because they were good to me when I was living down there, and every once in a while I will get a message from them seeing how me and Mia are doing.

Sooo about the picture, yeah it's definitely not a great one of me that's for sure. I look wicked tired and apparently I look fat. Lmao.

Last time I talked to Javier was about 2 months almost 3 months ago maybe? I'm not exactly sure, but it's been a while. Our last conversation did not end on good terms because he is just thick headed. But anyways, the other night he tried to myspace chat me but I ignored it. Then last night he myspace chat me again by sending me some video of the song "Creep" by Radiohead? Not really my style in music, but I listened to it, but never replied back to him.

Then he kept messaging me and messaging me. "You don't wanna talk right? That's cool." Ignore. "Well I just wanted to let you know I was in the hospital cause I had h1n1 but I'm better now" Ignore. "I don't understand why even be friends on myspace if you're not gonna talk to me Amanda?" So I caved in and just replied back and asked him about the whole h1n1 thing. Blah blah blah.

Anyways, it took him forever to finally ask about Mia, probably 25 minutes into the conversation <--Loser. He told me he's going to church and that God loves him the way he is, so he is continuing to smoke weed. (I had to just keep my mouth shut there because whatever I told him about God and weed would just not process into his brain far enough that he would actually quit.) He's not working anymore, and waiting to go to school. Typical. And I'm sure once he starts school he will stop going. He is suppose to go for some medical field study in college, yet he dropped out of barbershop classes because they were ''too hard.''

Back to the picture showed above .... He randomly said to me 'Heyy, I saw your picture, and it looks like you're gaining weight, you're not taking care of yourself, that isn't good.' I laughed so hard when I read those words. Yes okay, I am not a skinny person, I wasn't even before I was pregnant I always had a little chub to me, plus I am very big chested - as you can see. But the funny thing is, my weight NOW is actually a tad bit less than from before I got pregnant. My body just looks totally different now. I defintely need to go to the gym and tone up those abs, but who is he to say i am letting myself go. Why don't you try to be a single mom, while working and preparing for school 24/7 and see how often you have time to go workout? Lmao

This post became more of a vent almost, but it was a good laugh for me. I think it's funny how he said that to me after sending me that video I mentioned before - The song basically is saying that "I" am perfect and an angel and ''he'' is a creep and weirdo?

Yes Javier, you are a weirdo. Lmao.